31.5.14

Pretty Muddy 5k.

My creation

Today three girlfriends and I ran in a Race for Life Pretty Muddy, a 5k & assault course!! We had to run, crawl, dive, slide, and climb through thick, oozy mud, it was AWESOME!! We jogged the whole thing together, throwing mud and singing to boost our morale. I have never been so wet, or so muddy. I want to do it all again tomorrow! I am so proud of all of us for doing it, it was the best experience! 

I ran in memory of a wonderful, wonderful woman, Barb. My Auntie's Mama, she was so lovely and always lit up a room. She battled with cancer for years before passing away a few months ago,nand she is terribly missed by everyone. If you can, please donate to Cancer Research here on a mobile device, or by searching for BARBies WIN (Our team leader is Jennifer) on the Just Giving site. It would mean so much. 

Bee. 

30.5.14

I wish I had more time...

Untitled

For me. 

I realise that's a totally selfish thing to choose, and I'll admit I have judged mothers for saying things like this in the past. I guess I was in denial. I like to think I'm SuperMom, that I can do it all, and can do it all alone. My Mama's a very independent woman, always juggling more than she can probably handle, and I pretty much aspire to be her. But recently, today really, I have realised it is okay to admit you can't do it all. To need help sometimes. 

When I called Colin this morning, in tears I was convinced I was the worst mother in the history of the world because I'd lost my temper with the boys, they weren't listening or being particularly helpful and I'd just had enough. I just needed him to tell me it was okay, that I was overreacting, and be rational. I admitted for the first time ever that I was struggling, and he calmed me down and convinced me I needed some time alone. 

I've put the boys to bed, earlier than usual, and realised that I have been with them all day every day this week, no breaks except for sleeping. I always look forward to half terms, to spend all that time with them, but actually it isn't easy. I missed softball this week because my parents are away, and I've realised how heavily I rely on them. As childcare, just an extra pair of hands, an adult to talk to and share my (crazy) thoughts. Otherwise it all builds up and I break down, in floods of tears on the stairs, with my littlest coming to comfort me with a worried look on his face. That's the worst feeling, out of it all. I don't want to let it get to that point again, for them. 

When we're together I want to give them my everything, but that means I have to recharge too. Time for me & that means time away from the boys, away from the house. I do hate that that means time taken from the boys, for the first time I have consistently not been there to put them to bed, to tuck them in. Once a week, that is a sacrifice I am making, to make myself happier. Just that few hours, exercising & socialising as just Bee, not Mama too. 

mumturnedmom

Bee. 

29.5.14

Currently...

Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled

Feeling all the feels. I'm a little over emotional right now, due to a lack of sleep. My little boy will be two so, so soon and my Godson is growing so quickly, it's making me broody! I would have so many children, so it is a good idea to wait a few years before we're overrun (ha!) but it's heartbreaking too! We're in a really good place right now, I feel I have a good balance between work and home, the boys and housework, and Colin too. I'm getting out of the house a little more, alone, to play softball and spend time with the girls. It's good for my soul, something which I haven't realised I even need before. I'm feeling really happy. 

Questioning how far to go with the theme for Joshua's birthday. In my head I was thinking a mega simple digger party, but I started browsing Pinterest and now I want to do ALL THE THINGS. I'm seriously considering trying to raid a construction site to see what I can pick up for decor!! 

Longing to find the perfect bridesmaids dresses, for the perfect price. Wishful thinking right?! I'm after a long, possibly Grecian style maxi dress, in blush/light pink. It was easier than we thought to find a dress that suited everyone, because my lovelies are all different sizes, which is good. The one we really liked was waay out of our price range so now we're on a mission to find something similar. 

Watching Teen Mom 3, absolutely heartbreaking but I still love it. It's finished now though, I'm going to have to scour Netflix for a new series to watch, any suggestions?!

Moving jelly beans to my mouth. Actually, I've been moving and reorganising toys and stuff, trying to declutter a little. I do like a little clutter, I feel it makes our place look homely but it was getting extreme. Pretty, organised clutter is preferable. 

Linking up with Randalin over at Harvesting Kale & Lindsey at Ot & Et, two of my favourite blogs. 

Bee. 

28.5.14

Catch the Moment 365. Week Twenty-one.

141
141. Crazy that it was shorts and t-shirt weather last week but today it is grey and rainy - I'm tucked up under a blanket! Daniel got a new bike helmet so Joshua got his old handmedown, which he insisted upon wearing to the library... Pushing a pushchair is clearly dangerous biz! 

142
142. The boys reading their favourite story with their favourite godmother. This girl is simply amazing, she is always there for me & such a wonderful soul. We are so lucky to have her in our lives. 

143
143. Blue eyes, little freckles and messy hair, a tired boy after a busy day at nursery. He was pretty focused on whatever show they were watching. 

144
144. Snuggles with Daddy. Daniel's finding separation from us pretty hard at the moment, he guilts us by telling us how much he is going to miss us. It's hard having Colin work so much, but we truly appreciate how hard he works for us. 

145
145. I just wanted one cute picture, this was the best of a bad bunch! Visiting Nana June at the care home, after she had another seizure-type last week. Cheeky monkeys charm all the care workers into giving them all the biscuits! 

146
146. Starting the morning off slow, albeit early, while his big brother was in bed we chilled out and snacked on bananas - his favourite. 

147
147. A special treat - a dinosaur egg! - for having no accidents all day!! 

Blogging during "quiet time" while Joshua naps & Daniel plays on his Leappad, something I don't usually do but I'm planning on having a little date night with Colin tonight so no computers/iPads/iPhones! I've spent the morning tidying and organising our room, and the boys' room, plus dinner is in the slow cooker so I'm letting myself relax. Haha, who am I kidding, I hardly ever do much during naptime! Unless you count watching reality TV?! 

Nurse Loves Farmer

Bee. 

27.5.14

Trendy Tot Tuesdays.


Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Daniel :: Jeans & bobble hat, H&M // Coat, Tesco // Wellingtons, Mothercare.
Joshua :: Boots & chambray shirt, H&M // Coat & trousers, GAP // Beanie & scarf, Tesco. 

Parenting is such an emotional roller coaster, amiright?! I have felt every single one from absolute elation to utter terror today, between the hours of 7am and 8:30pm. I've been reading Laura Markham, "Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting" so I've been thinking more about my emotions and how I express them. When Joshua has left the table for the sixteenth time and is playing with a car instead of eating his rice, I'm trying to ask politely and just breathe, rather than getting cross. When he reaches over and asks 'Caca?' When he is supposed to be sleeping, to smile and snuggle him tight, and tell him how much I love him. I don't like labels on children but he is definitely my more challenging child, I'm not sure whether I expect more from him because he has an older brother, but he is definitely more cheeky and pushes his boundaries. At nearly two he still isn't sleeping through the night and it can take me up to an hour to get him settles and to sleep at night. Sometimes that bugs me, but I love that he needs me too. I wouldn't change watching their eyes get heavier, them slipping away to dreamland, safe in the knowledge I'm there, always. 

Linking up to Trendy Tot Tuesdays at Modern Camelot.

Bee. 

26.5.14

Our Week/ly Wishes.

My creation

01. To be productive. We're off on half term and I have a bunch of fun to end our dinosaur unit & to start our 'E' week, focusing on elephants and jungle animals. Last week we excavated dinosaurs from the sand, went to the library for books, made pictures with our Melissa & Doug dinosaur stamps. I also want to have a little spring clean and a sort out of the toys, and actually get rid of them this time so I can finish the spare room. 

02. To make healthy food choices. I've been home for two days and have eaten enough biscuits and cake to feed a small army, because when I'm at home the food is just there and I pick. I had to go to bed early last night because I had a headache, probably because of the crap I ate, and I don't want that happening again! This includes drinking at least a jug of water a day, though preferably fruit infused. 

03. To communicate more online. Leaving comments on blogs, Instagram and replying to tweets, just making more effort in general within this amazing community. 

04. To be more patient with the boys. To spent more time playing with them and to switch off a little more, less TV, less iPhones, more fun! These goals are all fairly lofty, but how will I ever improve myself without them. In an ideal world all of this would already be happening, but I have to start somewhere right?! 

The Nectar Collective

Bee. 

24.5.14

21/52.

21/52. 

Untitled
"A portrait of my family, once a week, every week, in 2014."

An extra special treat, cupcakes in the garden. I though that that would be less mess to clean up, they both went straight in the bath afterwards! I'm often amazed at the quality of my iPhone pictures, I was too covered in chocolate to go and grab my big camera but I am really happy with these. Couldn't resist sharing a few, one picture posts just aren't my thing! 

Untitled
Inspired by the wonderful Jodi, from Practising Simplicity

Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled

Bee. 

23.5.14

Fashion Friday.

Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Dress, H&M // Socks, Tesco // Booties, Primark. 

This dress was advertised as a top, I didn't realise it was quite as long as it is when I bought it. It's totally chiffon, as well as being quite short for a dress, so a skirt underneath is a necessity. Usually I wear a black dress but I think the grey makes the look a little softer. I've been wanting to try the booties and skirt trend for a while, and I even got some cute mint ankle socks in too. This was a little out of my comfort zone but I actually really liked how it looked. I've been experimenting a little with my hair too, and this fishtail braid is so quick and easy, and looks so pretty so it's obviously a new fave. 

This fun 'What's on Your...' meme is from the wonderful Julie's blog, Director Jewels

Dresser | Pretty much just a big mess. Our room is just the dumping ground and always gets forgotten, so my dresser is just a pile of makeup, jewellery, books and other knick-knacks. 

Perennial To Do List | Spring cleaning and printing photographs. I've got a lovely photo frame a friend got me for Christmas, that I've just out in 'the cupboard' because it's been sat gathering dust for so long. Joshua's birthday is a pretty good reason though, so there is still hope. Reorganising the 'office' too, which really needs to be done this summer as I'll actually need to use it come September. 

Refrigerator Shelves | Cheese, yogurt, leftover Mexican beans, various bread products, an abundance of fruit and vegetables, various Quorn products and a lot of Diet Coke. 

Itinerary | For the weekend? Bridesmaid dress shopping, an anniversary party, a friend's birthday BBQ, Daniel's friend's birthday BBQ, & my Daddy's birthday. We're off school next week too so I need to sort out some plans before we waste the week being lazy! 

Fantasy Itinerary | A family holiday somewhere hot, with a beautiful sandy beach and maybe some palm trees. And cocktails, of course. 

Playlist | I just made a Spotify playlist of summer time classics, which we jammed and cleaned to this afternoon. It almost made me forget it was raining! 

Nightstand | A broken lamp, headbands, books, a notebook & a bottle of water. 

Workout Plan | Hmm. We are running the Pretty Muddy 5k next weekend and I haven't got in as much training as I would have liked. I've been going to softball training and have been feeling the classic mom guilt at leaving the boys so I've been reluctant to go running too. Might try a practice run on Monday and see how I go. 

Phone | Hundreds of lists. Thousands of photographs. So many I'm running out of storage. A couple of apps for the boys, a couple of fitness apps, a couple of social media apps and a couple of photo editing apps. 

Top 5 List | Film nights. Fruit infused water. Unprompted hugs and biiig kisses from my boys. Half term! Lazy, rainy afternoons. 

Bucket List | I wrote our Summer Bucket List just the other day. I'll share it soon! 

Mind | Wedding plans. Money worries, after something went wrong with Colin's car. To do lists. Shopping lists. Meal planning. Joshua's birthday. 

Blogroll | Bloglovin' is literally my favourite thing. It means I can read two blog posts when I get five minutes, or while away hours! I followed a few more suggested blogs earlier too, I'm a sucker for a blog with beautiful photographs. 

Walls of Your Favorite Room in Your House | Our living room, baby photographs of Daniel, hard to believe he was ever that tiny! 

Last Credit Card Statement | I don't even have a credit card! 

Screensaver | The boys' most recent school photo, they look so young compared to now! 

TV Every Night | 24, or more recently Harry Potter. 

Also linking up with Randalin over at Harvesting Kale

Bee. 

22.5.14

Catch the Moment 365. Week Twenty.

134
134. Blue skies and fluffy clouds never fair to make me smile. 

135
135. Cheeky monkey enjoying a special treat - an ice lolly in the bath after a whole day with no accidents! Kiddo's not even wearing a nappy to bed anymore, he'll only be two next month! 

136
136. Freshly washed and ready to snuggle. He's obsessed with that tiger book, especially that page. He does a pretty decent roar too.

137
137. Sans babies at my cousin's wedding, my love and I. Such a beautiful day! 

138
138. I cannot cope with the crossed ankles, striped romper, baby flip flops ("fwipfwops") AND mini trilby. 

139
139. My biggest hasn't featured much this week, but gosh he is wonderful. I was upset earlier today and he stood by my side, rubbing my back and asking "Why are you sad Mummy? I'm here, I'm here." My sweet, sweet boy. 

140
140. This is real life. All day, errr day. 

Today has been a rough one, just 'one of those days' but looking back at these pictures makes me forget all the crap and remember just how wonderful these days are. I'm doing the 100 days of happiness project on my Instagram, to find the little things that make me smile in the everyday. Right now, I'm cuddled up with my love watching the final Harry Potter, it's these moments that make my heart soar. 

Nurse Loves Farmer

Bee. 

20.5.14

Monkey see, monkey do.

Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Untitled
Another all H&M outfit, except for the shirt which was gifted. I'm sure I have gushed about H&M clothes before, they are my absolute favourite. Such great quality for such great prices, as I have been reminded this week after a couple of our 'higher end' pieces started showing signs of wear (holes, mostly) and I have never had that issue with H&M. Plus, their stuff is so cute. 

Isn't it funny how you don't realise your own little quirks until your children start to mimic them. Joshua gave me a disapproving raised eyebrow look earlier when I asked him to tidy up and I suddenly realised I was giving him the exact same look! Daniel insists on having some photographs taken after he takes my outfit pictures, and this time he even copied my poses (except that funny face, that's all him). 

Linking up to Modern Camelot for Trendy Tot Tuesdays. 

Bee.